[identity profile] princegold.livejournal.com posting in [community profile] mens_studies
I have gotten real confused over my niece and I don't think I have handled some it well.

I never suspected any woman would want to be protected.

What I have thought I knew about women must be wrong.

Many women seem to thrive, get off on and like being victims. I figure there must be alot of masochistic women but certainly as many masochistic men.

I should have told my niece in the past that I would protect her because that is what she wanted to hear from me. She wanted to hear that she is weaker than men, when in all actuality smaller is no disadvantage of all and women are no weaker than men.

Her lesbian victim, weaker stance confused me considering she is a violent dangerous personality.

It's kind of like how people mispercieve men as being dangerous so many times. I have never been affraid of a man in my life. I have always seen them as much more immature and weaker spiritually than all the years that I have had to fight against women for my real self.

Date: 2008-07-10 07:49 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] hurlingdervish.livejournal.com
dude, what?! this doesn't make sense and it's offensive. may be you will have better luck articulating your point if you speak from your own experience and avoid extrapolating your experiences into sweeping generalizations. mens_studies does not = "let's bag on women".

Date: 2008-07-10 08:11 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] hurlingdervish.livejournal.com
hmmm. do you understand that worldwide- sexism and violence against women (mostly at the hands of men) is an ongoing epidemic? i'm sorry that you have had bad experiences with women but that doesn't erase the entrenched, institutionalized violence and oppression heaped on women EVERYWHERE, ALL THE TIME.

Date: 2008-07-10 08:33 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] hurlingdervish.livejournal.com
violence against anybody is terrible. period. but, when a man assaults a woman, the action is made more serious and heavy by the history of women's oppression by men. this does not minimize or discount violence against men by women- it simply acknowledges misogyny.

you can't be seriously suggesting that women rape as much as men do, or that women as a whole are as violent as men. that is categorically false and if you really think this, truly terrible things must have happened to you for your perceptions to be so warped. i feel bad for you, but you are still responsible for what you say.

check yourself, read some books.

Date: 2008-07-10 10:05 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] beandelphiki.livejournal.com
when in all actuality smaller is no disadvantage of all and women are no weaker than men.

WHAT. I have to assume that when you say, "women are no weaker than men," that you mean physically (since the first part of the quote refers to physical size). And the idea that it is not a physical disadvantage to be smaller, or that women are not physically weaker than men, is INSANITY and simply false.

Any martial arts instructor can tell you that while you can learn to use a smaller size to your advantage in some situations, in general being smaller is not helpful and is certainly a disadvantage. Sheer brute force can and DOES win out over training.

As for the rest of it...I don't EVEN know where to start.

We live in a patriarchal society. All of us. Period. Maybe you can find me some small, closed-off native culture somewhere in the world which is not...the rest of us, though? Yeah. If you aren't able to accept this concept, you're simply out of touch with reality.

I'm sorry that you don't, "buy," that women are oppressed. But they are.

No, women do NOT rape and molest as often as men. That's absolutely false. I was molested by a female, too; so no, it's not impossible. But just because it happened to me and you doesn't make it common and simply lurking extra-secret behind closed doors. Most sexual predators, in general, ARE MEN. Sad fact. Rather than trying to deny the truth of this, we (as a society, but especially those of us that are male) should be asking WHY this is and what would change it.

Read some books on the feminist movement. Read the paper.

READ ANYTHING. You're difficult to understand.

Re: New Start

Date: 2008-07-10 02:39 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] beandelphiki.livejournal.com
1) I'm sorry your childhood was so terrible. Nobody deserves that. However, you did not suffer because "women get all the privilege." You suffered because your family is abusive. You are confusing your personal situation with what the whole of society is like. The fact that society is male-dominated is not undermined because several women in one family are abusive.

2) Please feel free to provide links explaining why a smaller physical size is an advantage to self-protection.

3) Yes, molestation by women goes under-reported. That doesn't mean it happens as often as molestation by men. Also feel free to link me to studies that even suggest that women molest as often as men.

4) I suggested reading about the feminist movement because you don't even seem to have working definitions for, "patriarchy," and "oppression," given that you don't think these things exist.

5) Yes, I've read books on male rape survivors. However, THAT is very much off the topic YOU began.

6) Okay, there are plenty of people on livejournal who are gay, trans and have mental health issues. That alone should not keep you from finding friends.

But when your entire journal seems to revolve around how much you think women suck, then no, people are not going to want to talk to you. ESPECIALLY OTHER FTMS! I don't think this should be terribly hard to figure out.

Because, hey, I was raised female too. And really, the LAST thing I want to do is befriend someone who:

a) refuses to acknowledge the ways in which women in this society are oppressed
b) is obsessed with how men are apparently downtrodden by women, and
c) clearly just plain hates women.

Because I do understand that attitudes like THESE from men affect FtMs too.

I am not saying this to be cruel, but you need a great deal more help than I could possibly provide you with on an internet forum. Maybe your therapist can help you resolve your abuse issues, and your (yes, delusional) obsession with the idea that women are out to get you and all men.

In the meantime, I don't know if it will help you to post things like this to lj, since you're only going to alienate people.

Good day to you.

Re: New Start

Date: 2008-07-10 07:09 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] beandelphiki.livejournal.com
I came out when I was 15, and I've lived full-time as a man since I was 18; DON'T start that, "more trans than thou" shit with ME.

If anything, living as a male has given me a BETTER perspective on the way women are oppressed because I can see things I ignored before when I subconsciously assumed they didn't apply to me.

The world does not work the way you seem to think it does. Men are not oppressed, not in any society anywhere in the world. If your therapist actually AGREES with your delusional view of things, then good luck - but I don't think you're ever going to become mentally healthy with that person. You should be seeing someone who won't confirm your distorted viewpoint, but that would mean seeking out someone new on your own.

Nevertheless, I hope you eventually realize just how toxic your worldview is to you.

Re: New Start

Date: 2008-07-11 01:59 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] beandelphiki.livejournal.com
Your opinions do not make you male, "total," or otherwise. Your opinions and your gender do not cause each other.

Also, NICE, that "babe." You want an example of misogyny at work? You just provided one. You wanted to insult me, so you called me by a term which is a) patronizing, and b) reserved for women.

The "insult" lies in identifying me with characteristics associated with women - not only are you choosing to disrespect my stated gender, you are equating the state of womanhood itself with an insult.


Anyway, fuck off and kindly don't reply again. I've been as civil as I could manage with your rampant nastiness, but the fact that you just called me, "babe," when you, as an FtM, should know WAY BETTER? What, did trying to hold an actual conversation with you seem "girly" to your tiny mind, or what? DIAF.



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